I live in a house full of preteens and teens. (No, I don’t take Valium yet. Yes, I have a lot of grey hair. Yes, full moons terrify me.) All four are adopted and have siblings and half-siblings not living with us. We live in a rural area with a relatively small population. This poses a problem on the dating front. Even though my kids are definitely not ready to get into serious relationships, you have to admit that it’s creepy to have a crush on someone only to find out that they are, in some way, related to you. For this and many more reasons, I had a talk with my kids about not diving in too quickly into our area’s very shallow gene pool. But the thing is… they’re still kids. It’s a tough situation to know how to handle even as an adult. The advice I gave to them is actually applicable to everyone…preteens, teens, and even adults. In fact, I ended up sharing it at a Divorce Care meeting and it was received favorably…no one even threw anything at me!
The key is found in Luke chapter 2, “But Mary treasured all these things and pondered them in her heart.” I don’t know about you but if shepherds visited me and said angels told them something about my newborn baby, I might be tempted to freak out a bit and do something rash. But she didn’t. She didn’t take an ad out in the Bethlehem Times or post a selfie with the shepherds. OMG! Traveled a million miles on a donkey while pregnant beyond belief, gave birth in a stinky barn surrounded by animals, and now I’m hosting a bunch of shepherds who have been seeing things. What a day!!! Anyway, a big shout-out to my son, Jesus, who is gonna save the world…so proud of my little man. 🙂 Not Mary. She just stored it up in her heart. And that’s what I advised my kids to do. If someone compliments you or asks you out, it’s okay to be pleased and store up those things in your heart. It is equally fine to not act on them. You don’t need to say anything more than “Thanks” or “Thanks but I’m not dating right now.” This gives you time to really get to know a person. This is especially important when there’s a possibility that you might be related to them. But, truthfully, this concept of waiting until you really know a person is important for everyone. It would definitely reduce the amount of heartaches and divorces. So hang in there, store up the compliments in your heart because something amazing is in store for your life and you might miss it if you’re curled up on the couch, crying into your post-break up Häagen Dazs.